Are you in a one-sided relationship?

From message sender “Lani” |

I just need some advice from you guys. Wala lang kasi ako masabihan ng mga ganitong situation. (I have no one to tell about my situation.)

I  have a boyfriend and we have a child. We are not married.

I learned that when I was 5 months pregnant with our child, he had another girlfriend who was both a common friend of ours and his former classmate. I learned about it when he already left for the US. The girl was left here in the Philippines and I know they are still communicating and are still in a relationship.

I confronted him (online) and he said he was going to break-off with the other girl. But how can that be when I learned that he was even paying for the girl’s college education? I really feel that he has changed even in the way that he communicates with me. It’s as if he’s a completely different person now. Though he still supports our child financially.

Should I believe him that he will break-off with the other girl? I feel I want to end our relationship. What should I do?

He Said: Hi Lani, thanks for messaging. In a loving relationship, it takes a lot of patience from both parties to make it work. In this case, it looks like it is one sided. I understand that what you currently decide on is because of your child. Remember, your kid, first and foremost, needs a mother. I his mom is no longer functioning 100%, then he suffers ultimately. Seek peace, Rose. That is the most important thing. It might be hard in your current predicament to think straight, but you really need to decide for both you and your son what will bring you peace. With peace comes positive vibes and all things good. It’s best to make sure the guy still sustains your child. That is the least he can do. Huwag ka na munang aasa na magiging kayo pa talaga kasi nga meron na siyang iba. (Don’t hope that he’ll still be yours because he has someone else.)

Pray for God to guide you. I’m sure He has spoken. It’s probably time you made that decision to choose peace — for your child’s sake. God will always be with you. Your son is His son. He will be cared for by God. Trust Him, ok?

She Said: Hi Lani. While reading your message, it’s very clear that you are no longer happy in your relationship with your ex-partner and vice versa. It’s really hard to let go of someone especially in your situation because he is the father of your child. But do you think “staying together” or sticking out will still be healthy for both of you? Don’t stay or stick it out for the wrong reasons. Deciding to fight for someone should be a mutual feeling. You cannot fight for someone who doesn’t want you anymore. I understand you have a child together. At least he supports you with that part. Start fresh. Focus on your baby. Pray for wisdom and guidance. You will never go wrong with prayers. It works wonders. Stay beautiful. Be positive and strong for your little one. God is good. He will never abandon us. God bless both of you 😘.

P.S. Don’t post anything negative on social media. Not even quotes that is meant for him. You should show him that you are better without him. Life is beautiful. Enjoy it ☺.

Reply from “Lani”

Thank you so much po. Kahit sa ganito advice sa FB lang. Sobra ko po na-appreciate. God bless po. I know God loves me more than most. Ingat po. Thank you ulit.

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