Don’t Know Why

Don't Know Why

from message sender “Dianne” |

(We at He Said She Said change the actual names and places and edit some parts of the message, to protect the identity of our message senders.)

Hello po! Thank you because your posts are helping me a lot. Hindi lang po siya worldly advise pero may touch ng verses and spiritual advise as well.

I’ve been in a relationship po with someone for 7 years sa church po kami nagkakilala parehas po kami nasa ministry nasa dance po ako siya sa music. Ilang years nagdaan super ok po kami and we see ourselves being a family in the future. It started after we graduated college medyo shaky na po kasi nauna ako magkawork kesa sa kanya mahirap po kasi makapasok sa kurso na kinuha niya tinulungan ko po siya gumawa resume and mag hanap-hanap ng aaplayan. Na overcome naman po after a year nagkawork din siya. Nagkalabuan nagkaayos. Tapos po nag-try ulit namin maging super ayos hanggang may dumating na point na totoo pala na one day magigisng ka na lang na less love yung nararamdaman mo para sa kanya. I prayed about it. Even kinuwento ko sa ka-small group what to do at mas nagiging active din ulit ako sa church noon and mas gusto ko ayusin relationship ko kay God. I asked for prayers kung itutuloy ko pa or not. And then I told him gusto ko ayusin relationship ko pa kay God pero love namin isa’t-isa.

Pero parang ‘wag muna kaya ayun naghiwalay po kami. A month after, I told him if he would like to take me back. Ayaw niya daw po muna. Gusto niya muna mapag-isa. Tapos one month ulit nalaman ko na nililigawan niya po yung bestfriend na parang kapatid na churchmate ko. Hindi po nila sinabi sa ‘kin. Nakita ko lang po sa FB. Nasasaktan ako kasi di man lang po nasabi ng bestfriend ko na nililigawan siya. And of all people siya pa. Sabi ng ex ko po sa ‘kin di niya sinasadya magustuhan si girl. And ayun po ang bitter ko ngayon and super nasasaktan pa din kahit mag-isang taon na. I just can’t be happy for them.

I pray na maka-move on na ‘ko and makapag-release po ako ng forgiveness. Pero super sakit po.

– Dianne

HE SAID:

Hi Dianne, mahirap na masakit ang nangyari sa ‘yo but then, that’s life. Sometimes, when we release someone (or something) to be free, we hope that the person will find his/her back to us. Sadly, as in your case, may sumalo na iba. You have the right to be bitter. You have all the right to be angry. But at this point, wala ka ng magagawa sa ngayon but try to move on and be forgiving. Maybe, you are unknowingly angry at yourself kasi nga pinakawalan mo siya. Then unknowingly again, you should first forgive yourself. Then maybe, you will be able to forgive them. Pray for healing, Dianne. This is the best thing to do now. Then deal with your hurts and broken pieces one day at a time. God will put you back together again. But it all has to start with accepting that it happened. Baby steps. All will turn out fine. God bless you! – Tito Homer

SHE SAID:

Hi Dianne. First, ikaw ang nakipaghiwalay. So you have to accept the consequences of your action. Second, I personally think they don’t need your permission or  approval  kung niligawan ng ex mo ang bestfriend. Third, you don’t have any right para masaktan at magalit dahil wala na kayo. Kung bitter ka, talo ka. Kung hindi ka masaya para sa kanila talo ka. Kung di ka maka get over dahil feeling mo pinagtaguan ka nila, talo ka. Kung di ka maka move on, talo ka. So ano papayag ka bang talunan? Moving on is a decision that you have to make. Being happy is a decision that you have to make. Getting over is a decision that you have to make. So you decide. Pray for guidance and clarity. Prayer works wonders. Always remember that life is beautiful and simple. Enjoy and don’t complicate it. God bless. – Tita Jinky

Video: "Don't Know Why" by Norah Jones

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