I’ll be over you

by Joy Springles | shared on He Said, She Said |

The moment you read this, I just want you to know that I finally decided to let you go. And I am finally turning my back to you even though you already walked away from me.

There’s a part of me that’s telling me that I should’ve not started that fight, that I should’ve just let you feel that I am hurt with what you’re doing to me. That I should’ve not tell you to make me feel that you really love me. But I guess everything happens for a reason. I got tired of being taken for granted, that’s why I told you everything I feel. But you never understood and took it in a negative way. You chose to give up on me because you don’t want to do things that a boyfriend should really do. You chose to let go of me because you said, it’s not you who I am looking for. And now, you don’t want to give “us” another chance because your love for me is already gone.

I really hope you’ll find someone who will love you more than I do. Someone who will understand your busy schedule and still won’t get mad at you if you forget to tell her how much she means to you.

I hope you’ll find someone who will tickle you and you won’t get annoyed. Someone who will kiss you in the morning even though you refuse because you will say “I haven’t brushed my teeth”. I hope you will find someone who will watch you play dota and other computer games without getting bored. Someone who will kiss and hug you in public places to show the people how much you mean to her.

I hope you will find someone who will remind you to eat everytime you forget it because of your work. Someone who will climb the mountain top, explore the caves, swim in the oceans, and travel the world with you. I hope you’ll find someone who will let you eat what you want to eat and do what you want to do. Someone who will love your playlist and will play it whenever you’re not together. Someone who will cherish every minute of your togetherness.

I hope you will find someone who will stop you from walking away whenever you feel like giving up on her. Someone who will cheer you up and make you believe that you can do all things. Someone who will watch you fall asleep and still choose to sleep beside you even though you snore *sometimes*. Someone who will clean up all your mess in your room. Someone who will help you pack your bags for your out of town trips. Who will patiently go to every stores you want to go and check all the items that you want to buy. Someone who will try new food with you and isn’t afraid to gain weight.

I hope you’ll find someone who will patiently wait for you whenever you arrived late, patiently wait for your replies, and fell asleep while holding her phone. Someone who will always be glad to see you because for her, it’s only you who can make her smile that big. Someone who will hold your hand while driving and isn’t afraid to get lost because you’re together. Who will play games with you and laugh as if you were little kids playing tic tac toe.

I hope you’ll find someone who’ll always be contented just to lay down beside you and do nothing because what matters most is you are beside her. Someone who will listen to all your stress from work. Who will listen to your sentiments and failures but still thinks you’re the most amazing man. Someone who’ll kiss your hand, your forehead, your eyes, your nose, your cheeks, and your lips just to let you know that she loves every bits of you. Someone who will sleep in your arms and feels like it’s the safest place on earth. Someone you will never get tired of telling her how beautiful and amazing she is. Someone you will always feel lucky because she’s yours. Someone you’ll always be proud to show off to the people that she’s your girl.

I hope you will find someone whom you’ll always cherish and love unconditionally. Someone you’ll give your time and effort just to show how much you love and appreciate her.

I was that someone to you, but I guess I will never be that “someone” for you. Because after all the love and efforts that I gave you, you chose to let go of my hand. You chose to walk away from me. You chose to see me crying, asking you to stay. You chose to break my heart into pieces. You chose to break your promise that you will never do the same thing that my ex boyfriend did to me. You chose to take me for granted whenever we fight and left me hanging.

You chose to let me go.

Now I am choosing myself. I am choosing to let go and move on instead of dwelling in the past. I know it would be very difficult for me but I know I can and I will make it.

I promise I will never feel the same pain again. I promise I will never cry again because of you. I promise you will never cross my mind again. I promise that I will never gonna see myself begging someone like you to stay. I promise I will move forward and forget all the pain that you cause me. I am promising this to myself, that I will love myself first before anyone else. And I promise I will be over you.

I know, I’ll be over you.

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