A Letter to John Paul

by Jane Marcellana | shared on He Said, She Said

Don’t know how to put this in words, but you know I love you.

Months passed by still, not a single thing has changed. The moment you told me those words was my cue to give up on you.

Understand that in times I tried to do things which pissed you off were the best of me. The best of my efforts to hold you and not to give you up.

I tried to hold on to my happiness, I tried to hold on to you.

I just want you to know I felt so happy way back then. Happiness that makes me selfish ‘coz I wanted you all for myself. I’ve done everything just to make you happy. I’ve done things which I am not capable of doing but for you I’ve crossed my limits.

I still love you and want you back. But I can’t be selfish not to give you your freedom if that’s what you want. Know that it breaks me in pieces while you’ve turned me into trash. Know that giving you your freedom is breaking me.It still hurts not to hear a single word from you — why?

You’ve given me enough reasons to give you up. But still this stupid heart of mine yearns for you. How can I unlove you? How can you do it easily? How to be you?

How can I stop from crying at night?
How can I stop this pain?
How can I stop this feelings of mine?
How can I bring back the old me?

I wish I could hear a single word from you, I still deserve an explanation. So that I can live in peace and anchor into your words.

Wish I could to stop the what ifs in my mind. The Heart still wants what it wants.

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