by AMCL | shared on He Said, She Said |
It’s been a while since I’ve written about you. Actually its been a while since I actually wrote anything. I stopped writing but I never stopped loving you.
It has been a while since we last talked and our last meeting did not end well as I had expected. Its been months but just hearing your name gives me all the feels.
I wanted to talk to you. I wanted to know how you have been doing. I wanted to know how my absence has affected you.
Though it may seem that I dont give a care just because I never answered you back from your messages.
God knows how many nights I’ve struggled just to be able to not to talk to you and answer you back. He has seen my cry for months my yearn for understanding why we had to end what we had. He has seen how I tried fighting for the possibility of us. He saw how I was willing to lose everything just to have you.
Letting you go was never an easy task for me to do.
There never was a day that I did not bargained for our friendship at least.
Letting you go was never easy and to be frankly honest I wanted you to run after me,to come after me. To say that you would want me to stay and that we will fight this together. unfortunately I wasnt able to hear from you.
You accepting my decision broke my heart into pieces yet you and I knew this was the right thing to do.
Months have passed and wounds have healed I hope that the next time we’ll meet we will not be strangers with memories but we’ll be two people who has a well founded friendship with God at the center.
I thank God I finally found the strength to let you go and move on. I thank God that He was able to protect my heart.
I thank God I decided to let you go. I realized that I loved Him more than I loved you. I gave you up not because I am weak I gave you up because God loves you the way He loves me. I could never give the love the Lord can give you. But rest assured His love is more than wonderful for us.
I would rather have my heart broken for following His will than to for my will and break His heart.
I realized I love him. I love Him more than I loved you. I cannot let go of the Man who hung on the Cross of Calvary just because He loves me.
Until I am ready and until you are ready.
My love and my affection is directed to Him and Him alone.
Taking delight in His presence would be my main goal.
So until then I am letting love sleep. All my love and all my feelings I surrender to the one who made my life.
Even if we are miles apart and communication has died eventually
God has mended my heart and renewed my love for Him.
So until then my dear friend who knows maybe one day for the second time around you will be able to sweep me of my feet.
Ill be ready to meet you again with a painted smile on my face, hopes up and the Love of Christ offered to you.
all my love,
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