I’m writing this because I want to say something but I can’t say it to you personally.
You told me, that you’ve let go of your past. That it may take time for you to forget, but eventually time will heal you. I gave you time. I stayed by your side. I helped you when you needed help. I gave up my free time for you. Spent so many sleepless nights just to make sure you sleep first. I wiped your tears away. I brought you something to eat when you were hungry. Something to smile when you were down. I made you laugh. I kept you safe. I kept you distracted. I did everything that I could.
But every memory I make, you already have a memory with another. I know that the past can’t be erased nor can it be replaced. But why can’t you see that you can make more memories with me? Everything I did, I’m not the first. Everything I’ll do, you’ll remember the first. How can I help you if you keep remembering the past? How can you move on, if you keep seeing the last? I know it’s not place to get angry with you. I have no rights to force you. I also have no rights to call you mine. And I have no rights to your heart and mind.
It’s sad really. That all I can do is continue. That I will just continue to give you my time. That I will always be by your side. To help you when you need me. To spend my free time with you. To endure more sleepless nights so that you won’t lose your sleep. Too wipe your tears away. To bring you somethin to est when you are hungry. To make you smile when you are down. To make you laugh. To keep you safe. To keep you distracted. To do everything that I could do for you. Because I know that what you really need, is someone to take care of you. Even if in the end, I’ll be left alone.
It’s sad really, but I did promise you, that when you need me, I will always be here.